You're Old When...
• You can live without sex, but not without your glasses.
• You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.
• You enjoy watching the news.
• The phone rings, and you hope it's not for you.
• The only reason you're still awake at 4 am is indigestion.
• You're proud of your lawnmower.
• You start singing along with elevator music.
• You really DO want a new washing machine for your birthday.
• You routinely check the oil in your car.
• You've owned clothes so long that they've come back into style - TWICE.
• You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
• You consider coffee one of the most important things in life.
• 8 am is your idea of 'sleeping in'.
• You write thank you notes without being told.
• Neighbors borrow your tools.
• You answer a question with, "Because I said so!"
• Others ask for your recipes.
• You start Christmas shopping in August.
• You paint walls for a reason other than getting your deposit back.
• You don't like to drive after dark.
• You say the words, "Turn that music down!" too often.
• You point out what buildings used to be where.
• You know all the warning signs of a heart attack.
• You rake the yard without being told to.
• You can't remember the last time you laid on the floor to watch television
